This is going to be quite a vulnerable post.
I have had a miserable week. I have been in a miserable mood, and have had no motivation to do anything. The reason is quite simple - my wife and son have been away all week, visiting her mother. I'm so glad she could do that, but when we planned this a couple of months ago, I never thought I would be in such rough shape.
This is the first time we`ve been apart for an extended period of time. A few people said to me, "Ah, nice! You'll enjoy your week as a bachelor!" Far from it. It has been the total opposite. This week has felt like one of the longest weeks of my life. I've counted every second (It's only Monday?? It's only Tuesday???). The house has been a mess, not because I can't clean it, but because I've had no motivation to. I have missed or mis-scheduled three appointments, all of which were written in my day planner, and yet I somehow still missed. I've slept terribly all week. My brain has been completely muddled, I've been depressed and lonely, I've been bored, and no matter how hard I try, I haven't been able to concentrate or think straight. I`ve fallen behind on a bunch of things I need to do. It's affected my personal life, my work life, my spiritual life, everything.
It was a slope, I've noticed. It started after coming off the high of being on vacation last week and having a fantastic time. Coming back to reality is hard. Coming back to reality alone is harder. Coming back to 1,000 things on your plate that have to get done is not encouraging. And while the slope began gradually, it quickly became slippery and steep.
And the worst part is, Satan knows when to attack. A friend of mine once told me about a message he heard from Charles Stanley about temptation - HALT. Watch out when your Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. I`ve noticed those to be very true in my life, that Satan attacks in your weakest moments, when you are most vulnerable. This week was no different, and the attacks were intensified. I`d like to say I had a great week with the Lord, but that`s just not true. I had good moments of reading my bible and praying. But I also had bad moments of depression and overall...blah.
If there`s a couple of encouragements I can take from this week, it`s that 1) I know that I truly love my wife and son, and 2) I know I need God`s help more and more, always. I also know that we all have these weeks from time to time - it`s part of life - and I take refuge in the fact that it will get better.
My wife and son come home today. I can`t wait to get some traction on this slope.
I have had a miserable week. I have been in a miserable mood, and have had no motivation to do anything. The reason is quite simple - my wife and son have been away all week, visiting her mother. I'm so glad she could do that, but when we planned this a couple of months ago, I never thought I would be in such rough shape.
This is the first time we`ve been apart for an extended period of time. A few people said to me, "Ah, nice! You'll enjoy your week as a bachelor!" Far from it. It has been the total opposite. This week has felt like one of the longest weeks of my life. I've counted every second (It's only Monday?? It's only Tuesday???). The house has been a mess, not because I can't clean it, but because I've had no motivation to. I have missed or mis-scheduled three appointments, all of which were written in my day planner, and yet I somehow still missed. I've slept terribly all week. My brain has been completely muddled, I've been depressed and lonely, I've been bored, and no matter how hard I try, I haven't been able to concentrate or think straight. I`ve fallen behind on a bunch of things I need to do. It's affected my personal life, my work life, my spiritual life, everything.
It was a slope, I've noticed. It started after coming off the high of being on vacation last week and having a fantastic time. Coming back to reality is hard. Coming back to reality alone is harder. Coming back to 1,000 things on your plate that have to get done is not encouraging. And while the slope began gradually, it quickly became slippery and steep.
And the worst part is, Satan knows when to attack. A friend of mine once told me about a message he heard from Charles Stanley about temptation - HALT. Watch out when your Hungry, Angry, Lonely, Tired. I`ve noticed those to be very true in my life, that Satan attacks in your weakest moments, when you are most vulnerable. This week was no different, and the attacks were intensified. I`d like to say I had a great week with the Lord, but that`s just not true. I had good moments of reading my bible and praying. But I also had bad moments of depression and overall...blah.
If there`s a couple of encouragements I can take from this week, it`s that 1) I know that I truly love my wife and son, and 2) I know I need God`s help more and more, always. I also know that we all have these weeks from time to time - it`s part of life - and I take refuge in the fact that it will get better.
My wife and son come home today. I can`t wait to get some traction on this slope.
No comments:
Post a Comment